Baby Blues

With Miss Victoria I had the baby blues. This is different than post-partum depression. I was sure it was PPD though! I kept telling the hubs what I was feeling was not normal at all. He was very supportive though and just kept telling me it was, and it was okay, and the doctor had said I might feel this way for the first 2-3 weeks. It did slip away without me even really noticing around 3 weeks.

Before it went away though I would sit on my bed and hold my precious bundle of joy and bawl my eyes out. I was fine during the day, but at night when I was settling down to go to bed, after I nursed I would hold little Victoria and look at her and wonder how the heck I was going to keep her safe. How the heck was I going to make sure she didn't make the same mistakes I did? I just had no clue how I was going to make sure she turned out ok. I also had no clue how I was going to keep her little forever. I settled for making her promise me to never grow up. She totally lied to me by the way because she is growing up for sure!

Anyway.....I forgot about the baby blues. That's how fleeting they were. Then I started reading how other mommies were going through them on my birth board. CRAP! Once I remembered them I just started to dread them. I did not want to go through that again that is for sure! Good news.....I didn't!!! I just didn't have time to sit and worry. I see how wonderful Victoria is doing and how much she loves Jesus and church and I know I am doing something right. Plus, generally my night goes like this....bath time, nurse Emily and put her to sleep for a solid 4 hours, lay down with Victoria to put her to sleep and I go to sleep too. I don't mean to go to sleep.....it just happens. I am busy and get exhausted without even realizing it. I'm going to not fret about Miss Emily though because Victoria is doing so well and hopefully Emily will be happy and love Jesus just as much....and she has a kickin' role model in her big sister. I will say I had like a week where I cried very easily, but it was just that. I would cry and not know why other than knowing my hormones were just being crazy, but I wasn't sad, worried, or stressed.

I just want other mommies that may be going through the baby blues to know that they do get better and you are going to be a fantastic mommy so keep telling yourself that. The baby blues will be gone before you know it and they are very normal. Also....for 2nd time mommies that had baby blues....try to not worry about getting them this time. You may, but you may also be way to busy.