Tuesday, January 8, 2013

I'll admit it....I'm strict.

In this day in age we almost have to whisper it....I'm strict. I am though....especially by today's standards. I expect that my children will say "Yes ma'am" and "No, thank you" and "Excuse me." It is sad to me this is foreign. My oldest remembers to say the blessing before a meal even when we forget. She doesn't run around farting on people, having burping contests, or telling us what to do. Lord help her when...if... she tells one of us to "shut up."

My daughters are my most treasured gifts aside from my husband. I don't have to teach him though. He was already taught well my his mom. We have the job of teaching our daughters though. We don't take it lightly. We are not put on this Earth to be their friends. We want to joke and laugh with them of course but they...well, Victoria at least at this point, knows that our word is final. She says "Yes ma'am" and "ok, I understand." It is fairly rare that she chooses to throw a fit over something or tell us no. We have no warning consequence for no. She gets a swat right away...unless I'm having an off day and then the response she gets is "Excuse me. Would you like to try that again?"

Yes, we spank. Generally it's 1-2 swats on her butt with our hand that generally hurts her pride more than her butt. Emily gets her hand smacked once after several no's (just like Victoria did at the same age).

I expect respect and good manners from my children. Some would say I expect too much too young but I get exactly what I expect from them. If Victoria burps she says "excuse me." She says "May I please have....." Every once in a while she'll say such things as "Give me chewies (that's what she calls fruit snacks)."  When this happens I am actually so taken aback I have to just look at her for a bit and then tell her that she doesn't command me and she can try to ask appropriately in a bit.

I miss children not yelling at parents and telling them what to do. I miss the times before Sponge Bob (that is like the worst cartoon ever in my opinion).

I respect my children too though....don't get me wrong. Victoria can choose what she wants to wear for the most part (I know everything in her closet is appropriate since I put it in there), she can choose what she wants to drink (because we only have milk or water around here), and I ask her opinion about supper quite often. I ask her what she wants to do often. I love her and I know she loves me and that she is not feeling in lack of love from her parents that are strict. She knows what is expected from her though and I think that is very important. She doesn't have to guess what upsets us or if she is allowed to do something. She knows when she acts out there are consequences.

Anyway....this is my ramblings just to say yes....I am strict. I am sure I have come across that way in previous posts so here's the confirmation. It's quite odd to me actually what a prude I have become when it comes to raising my children. The thing is.....the closer my relationship is with God....I have come realize that I am trying to raise his gifts in a way that would make Him happy. In a way that they treat everyone with love and respect....to always use the best manners possible. I have learned recently that, quite frankly put, having good manners is acting in a way that doesn't make others uncomfortable. If my girls are always on their best behavior and acting like ladies than they will most likely not be making others uncomfortable.

Sorry, this post is all over the place. It's something I wanted to share my feelings on but couldn't quite come up with a fluent way to do so.

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